That Duck Life

You know what really sucks? Planning a wedding. Theres all this imaginary pressure, it makes me super uncomfortable. I'm a fairly simple person, and if its too frustrating to deal with I am so over it. 

As the days creep closer I keep thinking and asking myself. "Are you sure you want to do this?" not because I'm not sure, just because I feel like that's what I am expected to ask myself. Because movies and social media makes me feel like I should be living in this box... that you should get married or that you shouldn't based on statistics and "facts".. 

If you don't this this for your wedding people will think this way about you. If you don't pick the right colors it wont set the right mood. Is this too tacky or not? 

its not my style. 

And the answer is always yes... that I am so sure I want to do this. Sometimes I like to read old journals Ive had since middle school... I saw that I used to think of all the things I really needed in a partner. I used to talk to God about them, and yeah even though I was broken by failed relationships there was always something inside me that knew it just meant I was closer to finding that person who would totally complete me. 

I started a new job. I miss writing a lot but Ive always felt weird about talking about my personal life. I also know how writing makes me feel, so I feel like with the coming days of leaving my maiden name behind, our real adventure begins. 

I found my dress and if it wasn't for this silly hurricane I would've taken it to the seamstress to get it taken in before our final day. I cant wait to show you...